Have recent events made you overly fearful or frozen your path?
I’m riding smooth waters on a ferry to the Anacortes landing. The sun is shining bright and I have commandeered a window table for today’s passage. Ferry journaling can be especially fruitful because something about water and sky makes for a direct intuitive channel.
Although the ferry is moving at a clip, my mind and heart are walking with GANDHI an Ascended Master who has been teaching me lately. My mind is heavy because I feel stalled and afraid. I’m overwhelmed by a writing assignment with MARY MAGDALENE that I want to get out to the public via my website. Gandhi talks as if he is above me and with my orange pen-yes, I have different colored pens for different guides-I write as quickly and clearly as I can.
What is it that you are fearing exactly?
I don’t know…how to begin it.
You just need to meditate. (Pause) You are creating a new way of living. You don’t know the answers right now. You find them on the path. Each day.
Weren’t you afraid?
Most certainly, at times. But most of the time I worked with what I had at the present moment. Honestly, it wasn’t until I saw that gun in front of me at the end that I felt very fearful and by then it was all so quick, everything happened at the same time it arose!
Sally, everyone has different life experiences. I was humiliated. Later I was beaten and jailed. But I knew the way I was treated was wrong. You weren’t aware that what was happening to you was wrong, you were so young. The messages you received were confusing. That’s why it’s hard for you to trust.
What you are learning about is the relationship between FEAR and TRUST.
To face FEAR you must trust each day that you won’t be so confused by what you experience that you can trust the reality as it arises. Do you understand?
You search for a foundation of love-from others, from yourself-but understand trust is the foundation that layers of brick are built upon. When you question trust there is no foundation. There is no substrate for these emotions to take hold.
PILGRIMAGE, the mindful walk on the path, is about trusting that your steps are on solid ground. Your wholeness allows you to feel equipped to face what arises. All of your experience, especially the trials, allow you to feel that you can be capable to handle what is at your feet. You are never alone, Sally. Of that you can be certain.
Your life has made you ready to live your life.
Fully. With intention. Each day.
We start walking again. I was so lost in concentration listening to his wisdom I didn’t realize we stopped.
You are learning this now. This is brand new. Learning to walk with attention and intention is “doing the work” right now. Eventually is will be “the way.”
You fear what is ahead. But that is not necessary. You are not there yet.
Embrace each step and you embrace the way. This is the path of devotion.
We are at the Shaw Island landing waiting for passengers to load. I look up and smile.
In an early meditation with Gandhi, I told him I wanted to learn the Indian practice of devotion.
Looking out the window, I bathe my face in the sun, and take in this full circle moment.
-Nov. 15, 2019
Gandhi felt humiliation, I feel confusion. What feelings or experiences influence your relationship between fear and trust?
Are you aware of messages or memories that are causing your rising reality to remain obscured?
Is it difficult for you to see your trials as part of the sacred wholeness that makes you uniquely you?